EPIC INDIE SURGE FAILS WITH “UNDER THE SKIN”

🎥 🎞 Movie Review 🎞 🎥 - UNDER THE SKIN - [R] - Amazon Prime [2014] - Independent films come and go every year. You would have thought that the term "independent film" would have actually meant; "Made by complete nobodies with a micro-budget that fails in comparison with big Hollywood, but hey, this one has some class in it." But Skin is the proverbial "slap in the face" that proves that some Independent films, even ones written so badly, can somewhat aspire if you throw in a big Hollywood name, especially one who has an upcoming summer action film, and present her naked for all to see in a cheesy, classless pile-of-shit.

 

Now, not all piles-of-shit have a half life of zero seconds, and please keep in mind that Scarlett Johansson truly didn't do anything in this film that made me think, "Hey, this is where her real career started!" - nope, it was way far from that. Directed by Jonathan Glazer, who also wrote the script with Walter Campbell, this pile-of-shit won some big Indie film awards for it's musical score, the direction, and of Johansson's performance[???]...Uhhmnn, did I miss something here? I think that most of this films success comes from the fact that Brad Pitt was somewhat involved in it's development and casting.

 

Well, lets break down the story little and you tell me what big success this pile really has to offer it's viewers...most of whom will be males after I reveal the big surprise in the film. Okay, so without any real description, an alien arrives on earth and becomes a woman. She is helped by a biker-alien who loves to zoom around the countryside looking for her. She wonders from town to town, trapping men into entering an abandoned house, luring them in with sexy temptations to walk into a black muck of liquid that traps them - like the Venus fly trap plant. She discovers that she's more woman than alien and it becomes her weakness; I think Johansson delivers maybe twelve [12] full lines of dialog throughout the movies run...Oh, did I mention that Johansson reveals her naked body seven [7] times in the film, even revealing her bird in a closeup?  If you ever wanted to know what you might expect if you had a chance with her in bed, this is your chance to see her in the nude...yep, that's it.

 

The director claims that there was this really heavy CGI sequence in the film that he really wanted to keep in, but that it was taken out from the film to leave more questions about the alien motif and their technology, which was not explained at all. There are two parts of the films special effects that really took me into SciFi/fantasy excitement, but it came at the end of the movie and there was nothing more question as the en credits popped up after starring into several snowflakes landing on the camera lens; like a quasi Forrest Gump ending. The visual effects were sharp and produced well, but the aimless walking, scenes without dialog, and the doll-like performance by Johansson did not move me at all to keep focused on the film; it definitely did show a glimpse of why she might have been picked to play the lead role in Ghost in the Shell.

 

The cinematography was okay. Most of the film was shot in a guerilla-style filming format which the director felt at the time that he wanted to "catch real peoples reaction" to whatever the alien was doing when walking through town. In my opinion this whole award winning film was a waste of time and just another reason to build up the "what does Johansson's body really look like under all of that plastic and leather" curiosity with her male friends. I'm sure if your male, you won't pass on this movie...I certainly didn't. ⭐️ ⭐️ 💫   [2.5 of 5 Stars]

“JOLT” BRINGS SPARK BACK TO AMAZON PRIME

🎥 🎞  Movie Review 🎞 🎥 - JOLT - (R) - Amazon Prime - Kate Beckinsale is back in this action robust, gritty, sometimes overly humorous, but dark comedy that lights up the streaming window with fun scenes, while bringing a clear grudge-like, homicidal feel of entertainment back into the realm of solid movie making. 

In the recent years, Beckinsale movies have been a hit or miss with success, but JOLT has something not expected in both the writing and directing department. This movie is clearly an original installment of a possible series which could elevate the lovely Beckinsale into a new plateau of movie-series that are planned for streaming instead of hitting the movie theaters...and I like that!

Written by Scott Wascha, a first time short script writer who also plays a small part in the film, the format of the story falls right in line with what you might expect in a comic book formatted film. The action sequences are simple, but delivered in a style that you might expect from a real life  scenario when you're dealing with a sexy, semi-psychotic, impulsive bouncer with anger-management issues. Where most Beckinsale films cater up to a shoot'em up finale, this film keeps things up tight and personal, showing the dexterity of the actress at every chance. Each action sequence builds up with an overly explosive result, some make believe, some very real; but all of which result in a character building motif that makes this dark comedy a huge relief from the other robustly bad films that have been released from Netflix and forced down your throat with exaggerated reviews and trailers that doesn't have any class at all.

Directed by Tanya Wexler, who is known for being a bit aggressive on set herself, I found that the texture of tension between the main character "Lindy" - performed brilliantly by Beckinsale, and her unsuspecting prey is the magical touch this movie needed to launch me in the right direction at the beginning of the films character development phase. Kudos to Wexler for keeping the pace of the film at an upper level of flow, choosing not to use an over abundance of camera angles to "add action" to each scene.

Outside of a few editing errors that I noticed in a restaurant scene, the film was patched up well in post production. The surprise ending wasn't a smash up, "Oh shit, I didn't see that one coming!" moment, as I am sure the director wanted it to be but, the film had an acceptable ending that is surely going to lead into a sequel or sequels to come, should Amazon Prime gets off it's ass an push the advertising on this fantastic film.

Go to your Amazon Prime account and click on this movie. You will NOT be disappointed that you did! ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️  [4 of 5 Stars]

“TOMORROW WAR” TECHNICALLY AND TRANSPARENTLY DISAPPOINTS

🎥 🎞 Movie Review 🎞 🎥- THE TOMORROW WAR - [PG13] - Amazon Prime - Chris Pratt leaves this fundamentally flawed movie with a plot so predictable, that it just took the fun out of watching this pile of over dramatic, poorly scripted crap that I wish I had ever decided to watch for a fun evening. Chris basically plays the same character he played in "Guardians of the Galaxy," always obnoxious and filled with quick comebacks.

Presented with some fantastic graphic effects, this mesh up of crap tries to pull off a chaotic, fast paced atmosphere with some badly placed emotional slow downs that can only be saved by another rupture of alien prowess that suddenly no one in the film ever expected. Adding to that, there are too many similar plot devices in this movie that were obviously taken from the Tom Cruise 2014 film, EDGE OF TOMORROW; which now in hindsight, makes me giggle as even the titles of the two projects are similar. In both movies, the "alien species" that is invading the earth has a male and female species who are vital to defeating the enemy. At least in Cruise's "Edge of Tomorrow" movie, they at least explained the male and female species, where in this stupid movie, there's no explanation about how the leading scientist first discovered the male and female species.

Take for instance, the "toxin" that is constantly brought up in the movies plot, there's no explanation how the science team found out about it, or what female alien was originally captured and studied. You just have to accept that it as done at some point not shown and that's how it is, so sit back and take it. And in this film it's up to Chris' character to save the day by bringing a cure for the "toxin" back to the future, while he has to find a way to save his futuristic daughter. And lets not talk about how in movies, anyone can just jump onto plane and fly into Russian airspace...Whoah, boy!

Some funny things to note; (1) I laugh that the inconsistencies of the weapons used in the film premise. In the beginning, the bullets used in the film have little effect on the alien hoards thick skin, but toward the end of the movie, the bullets have enough effect to kill them on impact...yeah, you'll see that in the movie. (2) The movie does a horrible injustice to "time and relativity" and sells short of explaining how time works and how traveling through time can have repercussions if the time traveler doesn't respect how time works. And BIG number (3), Global Warming is the sole reason why the aliens began to thrive on the planet...SERIOUSLY???

I need to create a "DOGSHIT" rating for crappy films like this. ⭐️⭐️⭐️ [3 of 5 Stars]

BAD BATCH SLUMPS WITH DISAPPOINTMENT AFTER DISAPPOINTMENT

🎥 🎞 Series Review 🎞 🎥 - BAD BATCH - Disney + - This series certainly jumped out of the gate with an impressive start, but began to immediately plummet once a new character, named Omega, entered the series, aimed for younger audiences maybe?- and that little ingredient dropped the entire plot and story elements of the show into a needless circle of “mysterious plot lines” that have just gotten more boring after each passing episode. Quite honestly, this once awesome series has become too predictable to watch and sometimes too incredible to accept as magnificent.

The mere thought that these “trash” clones had to fight to survive, then finding themselves as outcasts, then looking for jobs to sustain ships supplies and food for the team, is now concentrated on babysitting a "new clone" whose increased naive tendencies leads the premise of every new episode. I’m not 100% sure if the writers have completely loss track of what’s important in screenplay and delivery in character development, as it’s obvious to see that Omega has no development than just to say that she’s in the way ALL the time, or they just lost track of what was important to tell about what the Bad Batch is all about.

There are some kudos to pass out in the action sequences, but all designs in trying to enforce that this series is a credible representation of “things to come” are just flushed down a deep toilet when the direction of the sequences turns to what Omega is doing, or being unable to do. There are lots of sad faced looks that Omega presents after each new failure, that happens all the time.

This series is turning to be just another waste of time in the recent “once a good idea” department of Disney’s new push to restore Star Wars to its much damaged fairy-tale legacy. ⭐️ ⭐️ 💫 [2.5 of 5 Stars]